Getting one thing done

After a trip to the store to buy batteries and a memory card, watching a couple of youtube videos and playing around with the equipment I was able to finally setup the wireless unit with the sound recorder. Now I can do interviews and with the video from my camera I'll start creating short documentaries. Write down some concrete goals, put some effort and commit to complete it. I can't think of a better recipe for moving forward. My goal is to do a 1 minute video to inspire people on effort or courage and to post it on youtube and vimeo. We put too much weight on the meaning or the why of what we're doing instead of focusing on getting things done and forgetting everything else. Dreams can come true at the speed of one goal at a time. What's your dream? What's the next step?

Restlessness

Some days are better than others. Some days are more insightful. Some days are just tough. I'm still not sure why I struggle to find a purpose and my passion. Sometimes I feel I'm just freezed by fear. Afraid of changing my identity, afraid of loosing the stability of a good job, afraid of looking deep inside myself, afraid of change, afraid of sacrifice.  I want things to be easy, ready now and without effort, consistency or failure. And when I don't get it I go back to my comfort level, look for another "dream", start whining about my job and start talking about new goals. It's so much easier to switch then to struggle.

Today I was working on getting a wireless audio set hooked up to a sound recorder. Basic stuff for doing some respectable audio for creating a documentary. As I was reading and playing around with it my mind just got blasted with negative thoughts of: "you don't know anything", "what good is this going to do?", "it's so much to learn", "you don't even know if you're going to like it", "this is a waste of time". These are the kind of thoughts I've wrestled for 36 years. I'm better equipped to handle them but it's still so tiresome to look the other way and just keep working.

I've read self help books about cognitive development, behavioral change, positive thinking and everything in between. The bible has good wisdom about living in the moment and love and passion. You can learn anything from any book, even one as childishly written as "The monk who bought a Ferrari" (I couldn't get past the first couple of chapters). But at some point you just have to put things aside, stop making excuses, stop complicating things and put sweat, effort and tears and just do your craft.

Part of powering through your struggles is becoming an adult, taking responsibility and committing to a life where your passion gives you direction. You have to commit time, resources, forget about instant gratification and breathe by living with your craft. Screw everything else, screw the insecurities, screw the people that put you down, screw the obstacles, screw the legacy, screw the fear.

In this life we have to love what we are, who we're with and what we do. Taking steps to follow our dreams is the way to celebrate our existence and to give it meaning.

What is jubilant sedition?

The Jubilant Sedition name came to life the day I signed up for a 24 hour film festival. I was looking for a name of breaking away from the mainstream, the traditional, the conventional. Seceding came to mind, eventually sedition appeared and Jubilant came right with it. Letting ideas flow is beatiful, creating in a way is not forcing things to happen. A river of thoughts with purpose will come to your rescue as long as you don't drown waiting for it. The lifesaver will get there. Ideas come at the right time, just as love, a good friend and a great meal.

Btw if you're wondering I never turned in the video for the 24 hour film festival even though I did write a script and filmed it with a group of friends at the office. No experience in acting, filming, producing, sound, nothing. And it showed. It was crazy fun and terribly looking and now it resides in the depths of my hard drive as other countless and unedited Christmas videos, soccer matches, birthdays, etc.

Jubilant Sedition will hopefully be a place where I can vent frustration (see paragraph above) at my particular ineptitude of being human, provide some insight into the struggles that go in my mind and heart and help or inspire somebody to follow their dreams which is the path of their hearts.

Let's work and be jubilant about our sedition.